Several years ago, I remember being struck by an article I read called Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware. The #1 regret – I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me – sometimes haunts me when I feel time slipping by. But mostly, it motivates me to consistently check in with myself and push past my fears so that I won’t end up with this regret.
The biggest roadblocks I experience in living a true life are not knowing what I want, settling for something that only meets some of my needs, being afraid to go for what I want, or putting others’ needs before my own.
These roadblocks show up for me over and over. I knew that I wanted to go to college but I had no idea what I wanted to major in. I settled on Geology because I had to pick something and I liked learning all the theories of Earth’s evolution. When I couldn’t get a job in the geology field, I decided to go to grad school. I chose mapping sciences because someone suggested it and it checked the box for getting a job afterward.
I worked in the mapping sciences field for over twenty years. Was I living a life true to me in my career life? No, I was not. But I settled on it because I didn’t know what else I wanted to do. It provided financial security and a great lifestyle for raising kids, which was the most important job to me at the time.
And then I discovered what I wanted to do instead. Thanks to coming down with debilitating health symptoms in my early forties that my doctors couldn’t help me with, I had permission to take the matter of my health into my own hands. It sounds silly for me to say that, but up until that point, I truly believed that the only power I had over my own health was to eat a reasonably healthy diet and exercise regularly. Western medicine would take care of the rest.
Once I took the matter of my health into my own hands, I started learning how our thoughts and emotions impact our health and our reality. I sought out the help of coaches and masters who helped me get to the root of my symptoms and take action to heal from there. For the first time in my life, I felt empowered, and I loved it.
I spent hours every week learning everything I could about coaching, emotions, and mindset. I passionately shared what I learned with anyone who would listen. I traveled for workshops and earned certifications. I started working with a few clients. I felt so humbled and honored to be able to support them to courageously live true lives. I wanted to do this work full-time, but the roadblock of fear kicked in. And the justifications for staying in a job that was just okay got louder until I talked myself into not knowing if I really wanted to change my career.
And then one day the fog cleared. I saw that my teenagers no longer needed a lot of my time and, thanks to the article by Bronnie Ware, I imagined myself at the end of my life looking back. I knew without a question that if I didn’t pursue a career in coaching, I would regret not living a life true to me.
What motivates you to push past roadblocks you experience in living a life true to you? Send me a message or comment below if you’d like to share. I’d love to hear from you!
Warmly,
Karen
